


Um Uh Merpeople Acting Like Highschoolers IG

by intellexual_asexual



Category: CrankGameplays - Fandom, Markiplier TV (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, ah shit god fuck damnit i forgot the beta tag!!!, also also this is really short and awkwardly ended, also you would not believe the amount of research i did for this, gjkfhlhsk seriously i really like doing research for my works, if youre interested in any of the creatures written in the story i will happily infodump, no beta we die like actor mark, sowwy 😔, there we go djfghhlfad, wow i am strangely content with this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 01:08:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29341821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intellexual_asexual/pseuds/intellexual_asexual
Summary: I really don't know what to use as a summary so here, have some quoted comments:Lottie_Summons: "[the Gongoozler] AND MER ETHAN TALK ABOUT OTHER SEA CREATURES LIKE MOMS AT A SUPERMARKET"Daydream_Fuel: "YES / but imagine, MER-MARK is with them, talking sh*t about Triton like mean girls in highschool!"I mean that isn't *exactly* exactly what happens but I gave it my best shot guys.*THIS IS IN NO WAY CONNECTED TO ANY OTHER WORKS I'VE WRITTEN LMAO*
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Um Uh Merpeople Acting Like Highschoolers IG

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Daydream_Fuel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daydream_Fuel/gifts), [Lottie_Summons](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lottie_Summons/gifts).



> Fuck I stopped writing angst for this. Y'all better be happy fjgdka /hj  
> Also the title is shit oops

“Hey, did you hear that Triton snuck out last night?”

“Ethan you know I’m not into all that gossip.”

“Uh, yeah you are, Mark. You remember what Amphitrite said to you a few months ago?”

“Of course I do! That bitch—”

Ethan rolled his eyes, letting his friend ramble on about the goddess of the sea and prove his point. Mark didn’t notice Ethan swim up to his living room window and pull the curtains back. It didn’t do much to reveal the outside world, since the curtains were still swaying back and forth through the water, but Ethan didn’t care as he stuck his head out.

“And then she had the  _ sheer audacity _ to— Eth you’re not listening, are you.”

Ethan, his head still out of the window, replied, “Nope.”

Mark sighed and crossed his arms. “OK, fine, I’ll listen to you. How did Triton get out of the palace, that place is, like, on lockdown at night.”

Ethan kept his head outside but turned to Mark as he said, “Apparently he tricked one of the guards. A few of them, actually. God, and he snuck out to make out with a girl. Honestly, he’s such a playboy.”

Mark raised an eyebrow as Ethan turned back to the window. “How exactly did he trick them?”

Ethan rolled his eyes again and said, “He used his powers, duh,” as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

It was not, in fact, the most obvious answer in the world, as Mark asked him, “Uh, explanation, please?”

Ethan turned to his friend again and said, “Triton can calm people down, Mark. So much so that he can make them fall asleep. I’d give anything for some powers like that, I’d finally be able to sleep properly for once.”

“How do you know about that but I don’t? I go snooping more often than you do.”

Ethan suddenly stuck his head back outside, his face red as he bit his lip. Mark chuckled and said, “Oh my God, Eth, and you called  _ Triton  _ a playboy? Wow. I’m surprised that you managed to fu—”

“Hey Gooz! Hey Mer!!”

Thank god a distraction swam by at the perfect time. Mark pushed Ethan out of the way as he, too, stuck his head out to see who Ethan was talking to. The Gongoozler and MerMer quickly swam past Ethan’s house and up the path, both of them waving in greeting before dashing away toward the kelp forest (well, the Gongoozler waved their hand. The Mermer just flapped their top tail a little more violently).

Once they were out of earshot, Mark said, “That poor thing. How that managed to happen is beyond even my snooping knowledge.”

“Birth defect.”

Mark looked at Ethan, surprised as his friend swam back into the house. “What?”

Mark swam back too and closed the curtains, again not achieving much as they twisted and turned on their own through the water. Ethan looked over at Mark and said, “Yeah, it was a birth defect. That’s what happens when two merpeople disobey the law and fuck, I guess.”

Mark frowned. He knew that merpeople weren’t supposed to… you know, but he had no idea  _ that _ would happen. He cringed and then sighed. “Yikes.”

Ethan just hummed in agreement as he swam to his kitchen. He pulled out a small jar, and opened it to reveal a stash of small fish pellets. He dumped some into his hand and offered some to Mark. He swam over and gently took the jar from Ethan, pretending to dump a few pellets into his hand. What he really did was immediately down the entire jar’s worth of fish food.

Ethan made a weird gurgling noise and sprang after Mark, shouting “You fucking  _ afanc!  _ Mark, you’re paying for more!!”

Mark laughed as he swam around the house, easily avoiding Ethan. He did almost smack into Ethan’s  _ dobhar-chú  _ mutt named Spencer, but he managed to avoid him at the last second. Mark started to get tired after a few minutes of being chased, and in an attempt to save himself he shouted, “So is that rumor about Gooz and Nessie true?!”

He heard Ethan stop short as he shouted back, “Oh my God, you wouldn’t believe how fucking  _ false  _ it is! I mean, I spent ages trying to—”

Mark softly laughed and shook his head as his friend proceeded to tell him how the Loch Ness Monster wasn’t the Gongoozler’s biological mother.

**Author's Note:**

> I made them as mean-girlish as i could jkfgkjd, I'm not too good with writing characters like that ugh. But I hope you guys enjoyed that, I'm inspired on a daily basis by the cursed conversations you two have fjkdgdld.


End file.
